All these colors...One prevails

I wanted to lay in bed and not get up. Start my day, my life with out anyone important in it.Away way back to the time when I once thought I was in love or to just a look at a few months back was a blast. To how much I have changed not knowing how long it will last.
I do it finally ; roll out of bed unlike the few days from the week before I actually get myself to the shower instead of putting on clean clothes and spraying some smell good on. I stand in there multitasking. Trying to keep track of time while I wonder off in my thoughts of how to keep this facade.
I put on my green polo's but blend it down with my grey vest. The irony of it how I try to show my bright but subconsciously covering it up with my true colors. As I wait for my ride to the life I no longer want to be part of or have no place in. I try again. I put on the red nail polish I have been saying I will do the past few days. Red, Red, Red, Red, Red, Red, Red, Red, Red, Red. As I look down at my hands...10 things race to my mind. for every finger I panted red.
Red for the flowers I wish you would leave on my door steps.


Red for the relationship I wish would grow and ripen,


Red for fire we lack.


Red hate,


Red passion,


Red revolution I could bring bring to this all,


Red for the battle I will fight,


Red of the sunset that seems to end us.


Red for my inside that bleeds,


Red when I reach the bottom of my spectrum.